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50 Cyber Monday Jokes, Puns, Quotes & Memes!

Looking for Cyber Monday jokes? Do you love hilarious quotes and memes? Then look no further because you’ve found the perfect roundup of Cyber Monday puns and jokes!

This list of funny jokes is sure to put you in a cheerful shopping mood this busy season.

Share these online shopping jokes with your friends and have a good laugh about them together!

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Cyber Monday Jokes

Dear Mondays, I hate you.
Not Cyber Monday; you can stay.

What day comes after Cyber Monday?
Broke-ass Tuesday.

Massive Cyber Monday Deal Alert:
Buy nothing & get 100% off in every store!

I bought a new vacuum cleaner on Cyber Monday.
It sucks!

At work/school on Cyber Monday:
Ordering stuff and getting nothing done.

Cyber Monday is no fun when you’re Cyber Broke.

Last year I bought an instructional boxing DVD on Cyber Monday.
This year I’m going Black Friday shopping.

In the aftermath of Black Friday and Cyber Monday comes “Buyer’s Remorse Tuesday,” followed by “Hiding From My Creditors Wednesday.”

Black Friday: Back pain, headache, empty wallet.
Cyber Monday: Tired Shoulders, carpal tunnel, eye strain, maxed-out credit card.

I hope your Black Friday injuries aren’t so severe that you can’t click a mouse on Cyber Monday.

I hope the Internet isn’t too crowded on Cyber Monday.
I hate crowds.

I hope shopping on Cyber Monday doesn’t take too much time away from your regular schedule of wasting time on the internet.

Cyber Monday!! Finally, a reason to legitimately appear focused at work/school.

Cyber Monday. The only time in the year when people look forward to a Monday morning.

Big Brain Thought: What if I buy more stuff on Cyber Monday…and then just return everything I bought on Black Friday for $5 more?

On Black Friday, You’re stuck in line waiting to get to the cashier…
On Cyber Monday, you’re stuck waiting for your computer to load the ordering screen.

Cyber Monday?
Do you mean a national holiday for computers?

Cyber Monday Puns

In Soviet Russia, they didn’t have Black Friday, but they had Siberia Monday.

What is that one day when ghosts go shopping?
Cyber Moan-day!

On what day do demons get the best shopping deals?
Cyber De-Monday

How did the hen feel after shopping all of Cyber Monday?

What made the root veggie so cheerful on Cyber Monday?
He was an up-beet.

What did the snake study in school on Cyber Monday?

What did the elf learn at school on Cyber Monday?
The elf-abet!

Why was the broom late for school on Cyber Monday?
He swept too much!

Funny Cyber Monday Quotes

Happy Cyber Monday to someone who has no idea how shockingly little I spent on their holiday gift today.

Shopping is a lady thing. It’s a physical game like football.
Ladies appreciate the scrimmage, the boisterous groups, the risk of being trampled to death, and the bliss of the buy on Cyber Monday.

Shopping: The art of acquiring things you don’t need with money you don’t have.
Cyber Mondays can make you an artist by just looking at things and analyzing them.

Whoever said that money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to go shopping.

Online Shopping:
Because it’s frowned upon to be in a store with no bra, sweatpants and a glass of wine

I hope that Cyber Monday extends to the deep web…
Because I’m going to need a discount on a new liver after all of that Thanksgiving drinking!

I shop like a bull — I charge everything! Cyber Monday calms me down with offers and discounts.

Thanks to Cyber Monday, I can now go hopelessly into debt from the comfort of my own home.

I skip Black Friday because my hatred for mankind outweighs my love for stuff.
Cyber Monday helps me catch up.

Cyber Monday Memes

When the Cyber Monday deals are lit…
But you spent all your money on Black Friday. 

When you wanna participate in Cyber Monday, but you’re broke AF.

I had to spend all of Cyber Monday shopping because you don’t pay me enough to afford regular prices.

The sale doesn’t end with Black Friday?

Seeing the mailman after a shopping spree.

I spent all my money on Black Friday now I have no more money to spend on Cyber Monday.

Me: I can’t wait for the Black Friday Sales!

My bank account:

The only thing I spent on Cyber Monday is another day hating my job

Brace yourselves. Cyber Monday is coming!

The worst part of Cyber Monday…
Realizing you should have waited til Monday to shop.

When Cyber Monday turns into Treat Yo Self Monday.

Yeah, if the Cyber Monday email alerts could stop now.
That’d be great.

Cyber Monday is Saturday and Sunday, too!
Monday means Monday!

Say Cyber Monday one more time…
I dare your motherf*#ker!